How to Choose a Surrogacy Agency
Agencies look remarkably similar from the outside — warm websites, similar promises, comparable compensation headlines. The differences that matter are underneath, and you usually can't see them until you know what to ask. Here's how to tell a good agency from a mediocre one before you sign anything.
I came to surrogacy from the intended-parent side. I sat across the table from agencies, read the contracts, watched how they treated the women carrying for families like mine, and learned — sometimes the hard way — that two agencies offering the "same" thing can run completely different operations. The women who had the best experiences weren't the ones who got the highest base pay. They were the ones who chose the right agency for them.
That's the whole reason Borne exists. We screen prospective surrogates and connect the ones who qualify with partner agencies we'd trust with someone we love. But whether you come through us or find an agency on your own, you should know how to evaluate one. Here's what actually separates them.
Start with how they screen you
It sounds backwards, but the strongest signal of a good agency is how carefully they vet the surrogates they accept. An agency that will take almost anyone is an agency that hasn't built its reputation on outcomes. Rigorous screening protects you, too — it means your intended parents are serious, the matches are thoughtful, and the agency has a track record worth protecting.
Ask: What's your acceptance rate? A good agency turns away a meaningful share of applicants. If they say they accept nearly everyone, that's not generosity — it's a volume business.
Understand exactly how — and when — you get paid
Compensation is where the marketing and the reality can drift apart. A headline number means little until you understand the structure underneath it. First-time surrogates in surrogacy-friendly states generally see base compensation in the $60,000–$75,000 range, and experienced surrogates often reach $75,000–$100,000 and up — but the base is only one line of the package.
What you want to see clearly spelled out:
- When base pay starts. It should begin at a defined milestone — usually confirmation of pregnancy — and be paid in predictable monthly installments, not held to the end.
- An escrow account. Your money should sit in a third-party escrow account, not in the agency's operating account. This is non-negotiable. Escrow is what guarantees you get paid even if something happens to the agency or the intended parents.
- The allowances and per-procedure fees. Monthly allowance, maternity clothing, lost wages, childcare, travel, and fees for specific procedures (transfer, C-section, invasive procedures) should all be itemized, not vaguely "covered."
If an agency can't show you a sample payment schedule, that tells you something.
One question separates the careful agencies from the rest: "Where does my compensation sit between when the intended parents fund it and when I'm paid?" The right answer is a licensed, independent escrow company. Any answer that involves the agency holding your money directly is a reason to keep looking.
Find out who actually supports you — and when
Every agency promises support. The real question is who, specifically, you'll be able to reach at 9pm on a Sunday when something feels off. Ask:
- Who is my point of contact, and what's their caseload? A coordinator carrying 40 surrogates cannot know you the way one carrying 10 can.
- Is there 24/7 access for medical or emotional emergencies?
- Do you provide a surrogate support group or peer mentor? The women who've done this before are often your best resource, and good agencies build that in.
- What does post-delivery support look like? The weeks after you deliver matter. An agency that goes quiet once the baby is born is showing you its priorities.
Ask about legal and medical independence
You should have your own attorney — separate from the intended parents' attorney — and the intended parents should pay for it. This is standard practice, and an agency that resists it is cutting a corner that exists to protect you. Similarly, the agency should work with established fertility clinics and walk you through the medical screening before you're locked into anything.
One more: ask which states they place in and why. Surrogacy law varies enormously by state, and reputable agencies work only where the legal framework clearly protects surrogates and establishes parentage cleanly. A few states are off the table entirely for sound legal reasons, and a good agency will tell you that plainly rather than working around it.
The answers that should make you walk away
Some responses aren't yellow flags — they're exits. Be cautious with any agency that:
- Pressures you to decide quickly or "lock in" before a deadline.
- Holds your compensation in their own account instead of escrow.
- Discourages or "handles" your independent legal representation.
- Can't give you references or connect you with surrogates who've completed a journey with them.
- Is vague about the total timeline or makes the process sound faster and easier than everyone else's.
- Quotes compensation noticeably higher than the market with no clear structure behind it.
Surrogacy is a long relationship, not a transaction. The way an agency behaves while it's trying to win you is the most honest preview you'll get of how it behaves once you've signed.
Where Borne fits
We're not an agency, and we don't try to be. Borne is a matching service: we get to know you, screen against the criteria agencies actually use, and introduce you to partner agencies that fit your situation, your state, and what you want out of the journey. You still choose. The point is that you walk into those conversations already knowing the right questions — and already vetted, so the agencies worth your time take you seriously from day one.
See if you qualify first.
The questionnaire takes about 10 minutes. No medical exams, no commitment. If you qualify, we'll talk through which agencies fit you — and help you ask them the questions on this page.
See if you qualify →